My tears have been my food day and night, while they continually say to me, “Where is your God?” When I remember these things, I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go with the multitude; I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept a pilgrim feast. (Psalm 42:3-4)
Extreme sadness, maybe even despair, is evident in these words. The author describes a man whose depressed state has caused him to lose his appetite, replacing food with tears of sorrow and anguish. The constant tears remind him of his feelings and the sense of being lost and cut off from God. Then his thoughts go back to happier times when, along with thousands of other worshipers, he would go up to the house of the Lord to sing and celebrate during the yearly feasts. And so we are left to wonder — what happened?
The remainder of the psalm hints at what may have occurred to lead the person to feel as he did — the reproach of his contemporaries and the oppression of enemies. But more than anything, it would seem the author is lamenting the notion that God doesn’t seem to be anywhere near him. At one point He even asks, “Why have You forgotten me?” I think it is fair to say that most of us have been in this situation; we feel adrift and far removed from God and are tempted to ask Him, “Where are You?”
But I also think it is fair to say that, oftentimes, it is not God who has moved away from us but we, in our hurt and despair, have moved away from Him — and from others. In other words, when we feel as if the world is against us, we isolate ourselves from the world. Then we allow our self-imposed isolation to influence our view of God as our Helper and Protector hence the question, “Why have You forgotten me?”
The silver lining in all of this is that, for those who have truly shared a relationship with the Lord, they know that He has not, nor will He ever abandon His people. At times, it may feel as if He is nowhere to be found, but feelings don’t necessarily translate into reality. In fact, the psalmist expresses hope for the future and says, “I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance.” If I may interpret His words: thought it seems that His face is turned away from me at the moment, I know that His face and favor will shine upon me again. And so as it is written: “His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for life; weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning” (Psalm 30:5).
Blessings and Shalom,
Bill
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